Mum's life: 'The number of children you have is irrelevant to the type of mother you are'
As part of our Mums Who Inspire series, we're sharing Tanya Harper's inspirational post about encouraging mums to cut themselves some slack. If you have a story that you would like to be featured, email mumswhoinspire[at]magicmum.com.
Tanya Harper is mum to Noah, four, Scout, two, one-year-old Margot and newborn Harriet; she blogs at FourLittleCreatures where she shares all about life as a mum-of-four.
A humorous blog, Tanya writes about her love of poo and finding joy in her children's antics.
But it's not all about the funny side of life because Tanya understands just how hard being a mum is.
How we, as parents, all embrace and conduct the role of motherhood differently, but with just as much for our children as the next person.
In a post she recently wrote for My Tribe of Six's Facebook page, Tanya encourages mums to cut themselves some slack.
"For a long time, I have been thinking about how even though our experiences with parenting are very similar in a lot of aspects but in others the are very different," Tanya writes.
"I personally love the diversity that each child brings to the family and how each child can change how we parent.
"This also allows for invaluable advise from friends and other parents that have gone through similar experiences."
As a blogger, Tanya admits that many of her followers think of her as some kind of 'supermum'.
With four kids and a successful blog, it's hard not to think of her in this light. But this title is something she brushes to one side, not convinced that it is a true representation of her as a mum.
"Yes, I may have four children but this doesn’t make me any better of a mother than someone with one child," she continued.
"The number of children you have is irrelevant in the type of mother you are.
"I can honestly say that overall I don’t find motherhood stressful.
Yes, it has its moments and, yes, at times I wish I had only two, one or even none; however, those moments are fleeting (and usually happen when I am sick or finished a night shift and I get asked to wipe yet another arse…)."
Being open and honest is one of the reasons everyone loves Tanya, as well as her realness – which is what makes her inspiring.
"I think the biggest thing that we can take from understanding how much perception may play in our parenting is allowing ourselves to cut us some slack," Tanya quite rightly explains.
"Again, I think it is highlighted by how the days we feel like we are killing parenting compared to the days we feel like we are failing.
"I think this can also offer insight into others and where we can share ideas on ways to manage our own anxieties and stresses around certain aspects we find concerning."
Tanya wants us, as mums, to take a step back, to look at the bigger picture, and to learn from each other.
"The point is that every one of us has strengths and weaknesses and this should be embraced.
"No one is perfect and our children don’t expect us to be either.
"I always find myself going back to 'it takes a village to raise a child' analogy a lot.
"I feel that this sums up that we need each other to raise our children to be the best they can be. It is amazing how much children learn through observation and as adults we are the same.
"So take a deep breath the next time you perceive yourself to be doing a terrible job because I can almost guarantee that you are not."
Her inspirational message is one that made us sit up and think, and realise that, at the end of the day, no one is Supermum.