Money talks: Don’t let your wallet affect your relationship

Love doesn’t always “conquer all”. Money, when you have it, or the lack thereof, can have a serious impact on a relationship.

We all like to splurge occasionally, and that’s tough enough when you’re managing a single budget, trying to pay rent, and feed yourself.

So, what happens when you meet the love of your life, and decide to move in together? Couples in serious relationships often share most of their money, while others continue to manage their money independently.

This is why it is a good idea to discuss your individual values before you move in together, as people generally have different spending habits. Financial priorities inevitably change when you move in together, so spending a few hundred on a designer bag won’t be feasible, unless you are minted, in which case you're grand.

Yes, it’s your money, but priorities usually shift to saving for a house, buying furniture, getting married, and having kids. This is a complete lifestyle change for some people, which can cause a lot of friction, especially if they are partial to more than the odd spending spree.

So, how can you ensure money doesn’t damage your relationship? Here are five ways to avoid a divide:

1. Be open

Discussing financial priorities is a good starting point. You need to figure out if you can trust your other half with your hard earned cash. So, discuss spending habits, who will keep track of money, and spending, and what to do if you go over budget. Will you have a savings plan? How do they feel about borrowing, and loans? And do they have any debt?

All of these things should be discussed, so that you can both be on the same page.

2. Relationships should be equal

Usually, one person earns a higher salary than their partner. So, how will you split bills, rent, and food shopping?

Will you split it 50/50? Or, will you pool all your money into one pot, and split what’s left over? There is no right or wrong way to manage this, but discussing these things will avoid conflict in the future.

3. Set financial goals

Setting up a savings plan for the future is always smart. Discuss what big budget items you may want to start saving for and agree a set amount to save each month.

This is a good idea, as it will avoid the stress of being landed with big bills you can’t afford in the future. It is also wise to put money aside in the event one of you find yourself out of work.

4. Make a joint budget

Making a budget sounds boring, but it can really help to understand where you're spending most of your money, if you are trying to save.

5. Bank accounts

Setting up a joint account can be beneficial for household bills, food, and rent. You can still keep your personal account, just agree on a set amount to transfer to the ‘house’ account each month.

Setting these simple ground rules from the beginning can really help to prevent future conflict.