Toddlers

Four-year-old is disciplined by a stranger, leaving Mum truly conflicted

When is it OK for someone else to discipline your child? 

Or is it ever OK for someone that is not a child's parent to discipline them?

Birmingham mum, Lucy, was left in a state of shock one afternoon when she was spending time with her four-year-old daughter. 

Toddler, Erin, was after having an eventful day of exploration with her mum, leaving them both hungry, heading to a restaurant for a bite to eat.

The mum-of-two explains: "For those of you who haven’t met my daughter, she is best described by the all encompassing parenting phrase 'spirited'." 

"She is absolutely full of life, always happy, always laughing, singing and dancing, but also a little over energetic and at times I wonder if her ears can hear any of the instructions that come out of my mouth,[…] she is living life to the full."

"I have to repeat myself regularly, ask her to be quiet often. But discipline her I do. I think it is important that she learns some boundaries, and I think manners are important. I also like others to see that she is corrected when she has done something wrong…"

And as a mum who clearly discipline's her daughter when she oversteps the boundaries in place, Lucy still was not on board with a restaurant waiter taking the decision to correct her toddler. 

While Lucy was ordering her food, little Erin was singing a song, she wasn't being loud or boisterous, just calmly humming a tune, until the waiter told her to stop. 

Lucy was perplexed, revealing she would completely understand if Erin was corrected by a family member or close friends but she doesn't understand or accept a stranger correcting her daughter for something so minor. 

"Today I watched and bit my lip as a waiter, a person who was serving me and my child my lunch, told off not only my child, but another group of children to my right."

"There wasn’t a smile, and it was blunt. Erin, to her credit, stopped singing. I didn’t think much of it at the time, but when I heard him tell another group of boys off who were sat with their Mums a few minutes later it really started to get my back up."

Lucy thought it was rude of the waiter to think he could discipline her daughter, she wasn't doing anything harmful and it's not natural for kids to be expected to sit quietly for a lengthy period of time. 

"Whilst I understand that for some it would be lovely if children could sit nicely and colour in their menus without making any noise whatsoever, most parents know this is a rarity."

"It happened to us once, and I don’t expect it will happen again any time soon. I also happen to enjoy my daughter's singing. It wasn’t loud, it wasn’t intrusive and she was a four-year-old who was having a lovely day."

But the mum-of-two was left conflicted, wondering if she over-reacted to the situation at hand. Would you mind if a stranger disciplined your son or daughter?

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